Friday, January 6, 2012

4 questions to self: 2011/2012

It's that time of the year again. For two years (maybe 3), i've been doing a 'look back'. Wasn't going to miss this year even though we're almost a week into 2012. Nevertheless, here's my observation of 2011.

2011 was, simply put, bloody awesome. I never imagined i would grow so much as a person and doors after doors of opportunities opened for me. All praises be to the One who has made it so for me.

I remember walking into the year wanting to leave behind all the pain of 2010, i wanted to really heal and then charge ahead. In healing, i found a completely different perspective of life and from that view of the 'grand scheme of things', i've never been happier. This 'perspective' is spirituality.

Note that this was never part of the 'plan'. I knew i was starting to get more curious and more engaged in finding out how to be wholly happy in this terrifying day and age but lo and behold! I found a way of life, a little 'trick' that gives you clarity and sheds light in the areas of life we never did explore. I never imagined i'd get on this path but i do believe that anyone can walk this way for as long as you sincerely 'seek' an answer to all the knots in your head. The keyword here is: sincere.

And be brave, take what you've learnt on a test run and you might find that some people frown or laugh or hiss bitter little things at you but you're in charge of your own life so take control. If you like your new lifestyle, pack up and MOVE for good. Some parts of your life will repair while others change forever but this new life is worth starting afresh. Keep going & feel liberated.

So some priorities changed, some resolutions changed, some new stuff added and some removed permanently. 2011 also saw me taking on a new job, getting engaged to my bestfriend (and my heartbreaker no less haha), nailed my own place (that's in the works now), going organic, quitting my hedonistic addiction, reforming myself and sorting out my life for at least the next couple of years. So last year was truly a TRANSITIONAL year.

This year, its just going through the motions. I won't be complacent to ride on this peace of mind, i do intend to exercise my brain juices to learn more, see more, try more and do more. I intend to travel a little further, do the things i've always wanted to do or try - while building on a fatter wallet (big challenge).

My personal resolutions are to maintain a more positive outlook, overcome my lack of self discipline, try to hold up a few pillars as best as i can, get into the pink of health (more healthier choices to be made) and then finally i hope to end the year with a 10km run. Note: i hated running with a passion, it's a love-hate relationship now but this is to prove to myself that i can do ANYTHING as long as i put my fire into it and just blaze.

So i will turn 24 this year, i still want to shy away from it but hey if i can pack up my life's resume with as much experience and learning as i can, i may very well be living 35 years of life at what, 26? Yes, i'm a bit too ambitious i admit. Just wish me well because i will be on my way anyway.

And now for my 4 questions posted end of 2010 for the end of 2011:

Are you happy?
Never been happier. Its not the status of my life it's the clarity of my head, ridding the heart of all things negative and then leaving behind everything that brings bad energy.

Did you fulfill all your resolutions (including a driver's license!)?
Haha! Yes all my resolutions have been fulfilled and much more, WITH THE EXCEPTION of my driver's license. This is the only big fail for me. Nevertheless, better late than never. My lessons will roll out in two weeks!

Are you truly living & your soul put together?
To compare where i was mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually, i feel yes i'm finally living. Like i finally know how to without being miserable all the time. I'm so much braver and far much tougher but without all the angst and temper. I deal with failure so much better! Still living life on the fast lane but i take breathers now and mastered the 'art of doing nothing'. Put that into practice ever so often now.

Is my soul put together?
It's a daily struggle, some days i'm in and some days i'm out. But the struggle is what makes the journey. And there is no one who has the correct formula for this. So on days i'm scattered, i'll tell myself "try again tomorrow".

What did you do as a form of charity?
This is a little personal. It wasn't huge but it was sufficient and constant enough. To say what i did would belittle great people and portray them as poor and incapable. These guys are humble, beautiful folks. I just think of it as sharing or as giving back because they're too kind. Just not feeling the word 'charity' here.

So four questions for the end of this year:

Did you get that god damn driver's license (haha!)?
Did you travel to the places you wanted to?
Are you healthier & ran that 10km race?
Were you balanced the whole year?

There you have it. Nothing too deep because we've covered all the inner works last year. This year's theme is balance. I will have fun, be fitter, more disciplined, explore places, learn new things and stretch out my time daily to accomplish all my obligations & resposibilities.

I hope you all had a great year and an even better one this year.

I'll conclude this post with my annual saying:
It's a new year full of chances to try again where we failed, to progress further from what we've accomplished, to take on new challenges, to be making a difference in the world, to ultimately be a better person. Year after year. Let's age with courage, grace, love, & wisdom.

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